Bud The Teacher

The link above goes to a letter in which I find wholehearted agreement, both as a parent and as an educator.

Stop bribing the kids to take risks and do the hard things in life.... they are their own reward, and we are removing that from the next generation's worldview.

The summer...

Well, grades are in, and the room is closed up for the year...

I only had two failures; however, don't be terribly impressed. The vast majority of those who were failing dropped out before they could complete the course. The joys of teaching English II.

I am now attending summer grad classes. The current one is on the use of the local smartboards. This is well and good except that I move considerably faster than most in the class, and so have found myself doing everything from re-reading B. F. Skinner to reaquaint myself with the vocabulary of tacting and manding, to creating curriculum for next year.

It is all good; I've picked up a few tricks that hadn't occured to me, and am finding many things I will use later on in the year.

Final editions....

So here we are on the last day of finals; the last exam is to be given, and grades entered, and a host of end-of-the-year paperwork.

You would think it is time for a break, right? (Be quiet in the back with the snarky comments, experienced teachers in the back).

Not so much. Monday, the grad classes begin. At least it is something in technology, and not something that will prove totally useless...

On that final note, watching these students taking the final exam has proved to at least be entertaining. Before I can describe the scene, a short description of the final would prove very useful. We use a departmental final here, allowing for every student at a particular level to be assessed by the same standard.  With that said, I've tailored every assessment we've done in this class to match the format, taught my students standardized tests as a genre so as t allow them to decode them, and even spent the last week specifically reviewing and reteaching material from across the semester to make sure that none of it was unfamiliar.

For some, you would be convinced that this was the first time they had seen this material, ever. One student in particular was repeatedly sighing, widening her eyes at every single question, and acting as if each and every one of them was a massive ordeal, a surprise attack upon their sensibilities the likes of which had never been seen before and would never be seen again.

This was for English II CP.

It is as it is. Grad classes and summer preparation here I come.

Sitting on the Dock of the Bay...

Welcome to the stupidest portion of the year.

Finals.

I have finished grading, packed the room, and am completely ready to leave for the day.

But, I need to be here, not because of any pressing need, or because I am not in a salaried position which is paid for the job, and not necessarily even because there is some waste of time pseudo-thought-out staff development "opportunity" that the school board, with its complete lack of professional experience as educators has decided that I need, but because the work day doesn't end until 4.

One day, someone will actually ask an educator what is needed to run a school.

One day, it will be left to front-line educators, who actually know what is necessary to keep their classrooms working, and what their students need to decide resource priorities.

But it seems it is not today.

So, here I sit... with nothing to do... at all.... *sigh*

Leaving their mark...

The picture says it all. These seniors are done.

Spelling and other nagging issues...

Okay, this is a simple vent.

I would think, having completed such a program myself recently, that one would have to be able to spell the word "easel." That is all.

Interesting events....

Last few weeks, in brief...

Parasites within the ladies bathroom
Tornadoes destroying portions of the environmental center
Three more random fights


Also students have actually been paying attention, we are getting in a second Shakespearean play (Hamlet), and might actually be ready for finals.

And I've been asked by the Senior Class to walk with them on class day; full regalia and everything...

Time is short as the semester ends, but things go well, all things considered...

And.... we're back...

So, yesterday, we returned from Spring Break, and tried to get right back in the swing of things.

The difficulty is, the swing of things as defined by me is considerably different from the swing of things as defined by my students. I came back ready to tackle the last bits of literature and writing we needed to complete before the end of the semester. My kids, on the other hand, seem to have come back ready to tackle each other.

Two examples of this immediately spring to mind, and oddly enough, both are from the English II crew...

First we have student A, whom we will call Bones, for reasons of anonymity. Mr. Bones seems to be under the impression that the swing of things should involve his attempting to surreptitiously violently jostle his male colleagues family heirlooms, much to the dismay of the room.

On the other end of the spectrum, we have student B, whom we will call Mr. Wendall. Mr. Wendall seemed to feel that the swing of things should include at least some jack-o-lantern commentary added to every task within the classroom. This included complaining loudly at having to take notes, complaining loudly about having to use paper and pencil, and complaining at a high pitched whine, likely only heard by dogs and small rodents, about having to finish the last writing assignment of the semester.

Perhaps today will be different... at least, one hopes that the swing of things no longer collides with other student's junk..... 

T'was the day before Spring Break...

So, we've survived high stakes testing; the kids have nearly all reported that what we had done in class had helped them tremendously in preparing for the test itself. The only problem is, it has left the jackolanterns all wound up, and without an outlet.

Thus far, I've confiscated a steel hammer, written two referrals for playing soccer with the trashcan outside the restrooms across the hall, and had to explain why we have to work before spring break...

Just need to get through, that's all.....

High stakes testing...

So, today marks off the beginning of the state-mandated high stakes testing....

Leaving aside the obvious - it doesn't come close to measuring what it actually purports to measure, it isn't a fair evaluation of students by any stretch of the imagination, and it only serves to sour what is, for some, an already bitter relationship - today is going to suck for an even worse reason....

Today, without the escape valve of "You don't have to go home, but you can't stay here" of afterschool duty, I get to play hall monitor....

Yay me....

Spring Break?

So, here we are, about a week before spring break...

Why so late, you ask? Because the Easter Bunny, with his pastel-egg laying chickens... but that is a different rant.

Anyway, a short list of the last few weeks...

A rash of kids caught in compromising conditions has brought about a rash of rashes and a flurry of referrals...

Sophomore dropout season has begun - 3 this week alone....

Prom has come and gone; kudos to the kids for pulling off a great prom on a shoestring...

Some of my jack-o-lanters have taken to texting parents from the bathroom that they are sick, resulting in the nurse having to find them to send them home sick, even though she hasn't seen them at all...

The high stakes test that doesn't come close to measuring what it claims to measure is coming up, right before spring break; the kids are focused.... on spring break.

Kid walked in with gold shoes. Seriously, he walked in with shoes spray-painted gold, with purple laces, for a step competition being held tonight. The uproar was.... interesting...

I've had to block out my door windows to prevent the silent conversations through them; only to have a host of ding-dong-ditch games being played outside the room now.

I'm wired...

Well, sort of. Yesterday, they invaded my room to add an ethernet port to my sad little 15 year old access point.

They swore up and down that the jack would be no problem to add, that it would be here today, etc.

Yet, here I sit, looking at an open box, an uncrimped and uninstalled cat-5 cable handing out of the wall, and my lonely little ethernet port is hanging by its threads....

The joys of the lowest bidder are upon us...

Here's hoping that my internet connection, which is literally hanging by a wire, stays connected today. Not that it does even when fully installed, mind you, but at least it is usually working when I need it to teach.

Excuses

Having just finished grading and entering the last of the research project, I have a single request.

I have no idea who reads this, and honestly, it is more for catharsis than anything. With that having been said, here it goes.

STOP MAKING CRAZY-@$$, CRASS, INANE, POSSIBLY PHYSICALLY IMPOSSIBLE EXCUSES FOR WHY YOU DIDN'T COMPLETE THE BLASTED, BLOODY, GOD(S)-FORSAKEN ASSIGNMENT!!!!

If you didn't finish it on time, and just forgot, say so.

If you just didn't care, say so.

If your Great-Aunt ( Twice Removed) Ethel died, say so.

And bring me an obituary.

I swear, in the last week, I have heard every excuse imaginable.

The substitute said you didn't have to do it.

This one kid, in third block (why is it always third block?!?!?!?!?), stabbed this other kid because this third kid (again with the third!) said that the first kid was with the second kid's girl, but really the third kid was with the second kid's girl, and the first kid had nothing to do with it. Oh, and you were so confused that you forgot the assignment.

The pipes in the bathroom exploded, and prevented your getting to the media center to type - for a month.

Your house is being fumigated for exotic African titmouse fleas, and you couldn't get to your paper, which is sitting, complete with highlighted sources, an outline and an annotated bibliography, on your bed. For a month...

Your cat decided that it wanted to read your paper, and hid it somewhere in the laundry room, and you still can't find it, though you did find that other set of toe-socks you were missing.

There was a bomb threat, and you were just too shaken up to remember to bring the draft to class.

Okay, the last one is almost valid, but the rest? Really? Fumigated?

*sigh*

The energy you've wasted on coming up with an elaborate lie, even with poorly forged, and easily checked evidence, is more than it would have taken to write the blasted one page research paper, which only had to have two sources, one of which was online!

*ARGH*

So the question is....

Do I have a job next year?


We relocated our family here to be a part of this school district.

I studied for years to be able to better the minds of my community and my country.

I accept wages that are well below similarly prepared and degree-holding counterparts, so as to be able to devote my career to public service in this suffering community.

And now, they are hinting that they may not be needing teachers next year.

How is that for a "thank you for your service?"

I move 60 miles, uproot my family in the process, accept lower pay than elsewhere in the state where there were standing offers so as to work in a school that needed me, and now there is a possibility that I might not be here next year.

We will see what the meeting holds; evaluations are being done, so we will see.

The Beginning (and always with or without a classroom) Teacher

The Duldrums

Welcome to the duldrums....

Classes are going fine, which is a nice change. The sophomores aren't as exciting as the seniors were, but they learn, and they do show progress, which is good.

I'm a little under the weather, and I can't decide if it is a matter of the time of year or a persistent cold that won't go away.

Nevermind the weekend spent delousing the house thanks to a 6 y.o. daughter's more than affectionate classmate...

More later when the time comes; and I still maintain, she was NO Axel Rose...

Quesadillas and Cocoa Puffs

Well, I've heard it all...

According to my students, these are the lunches of choice at SHS...

And so it begins... again...

New semester started today....

Beyond the usual book shortages that seem to plague the second semester, here are a few reflections to match this first day...

My English II Standard kids are terrified of school, especially of English. In my conversation with them today, they described English as "reading a bunch of stories that they didn't like, and watching movies."

We will have to change this. I see illustrations in their future...

With that said, I also think that it might be the age as well. Seniors, the students I had last semester, have been with each other for a while, and have a functioning community already. As a result, they were more open from the get-go, thinking that there were more of them than there was of me. The sophomores haven't realized that yet, and I think I will be taking advantage of that situation so long as it lasts.

I have another section of English IV CP this semester; they took a section of English II Standard, and gave me the seniors again. They, frankly, think I am a little nuts. Being more experienced students, they are more ready to go at the beginning of the course, and that is something of a double-edged sword. While it is easier to get Socratic dialogue going with them, and harnessing their thoughts on English as a discipline and a Discourse (I know, a little too much theory there, but I am vetting it somewhat with experience), they are also much more prone to independent actions when it is not entirely appropriate.

For fourth block, I have a new set of sophomores for English II CP. I think I am going to enjoy this group, though I might have experimented a little too much with them . I planned in some free time at the end of class today, allowing them to speak in small groups together, and generally socialize. The theory here was that I could observe their interactions with one another, figure out who was socially involved with who, and nip those things in the bud quickly. At the beginning of the first semester, I allowed a great deal of freedom to my students. They could choose where to sit for some time, they had independent time at the end of class, they were allowed to have a little chaos. The idea, and honestly the reality as well, was that I would be able to observe them discretely, observe their behaviors, and know them as complete learners, not simply performance within academic areas. However, I spent a good deal of time afterward reinforcing and restructuring the classroom.

This time, I planned for it for a day; we will see how I can establish order tomorrow. From a research perspective, this is interesting; that said, I can't lose sight of why I am here.

More tomorrow, as it comes...

And so it is finished...

Well, today was my last day of teaching of the first semester of my professional career.

Tomorrow, they will take the final, grades will be entered, they will pass or fail, and a new batch will come in the door.

I would like to say that the spark I had starting teaching were still there.

It is, actually.

Still, it is tempered with a bit of experience as well. Lessons learned during this semester include:

Talk as loud as you intend to the entire semester within the first week, and no louder. You are setting a baseline for the semester.

The whole "don't let them see you smile before December" idea has some truth to it, though not the truth on the surface. It is more important that rules stay clear and firm; with that said, killing them with kindness is much more effective than blasting out their ear drums.

Not every thing that you do within class needs to be graded; in fact, it is better if the preponderance of it is not.

Never let them see you blink. Also, don't be afraid to be wrong either. Mistakes happen, and to pretend otherwise is to be disconnected with reality. The key, for both you and your students, is how you handle the mistakes that will inevitably come.

Don't forget why you chose to teach this subject to teach. You can't teach what you don't love, and your students can develop no further than you have in your love of the discipline.

Finally, you don't need to cover every element of every work you cover, or every purpose, corner and cranny of a piece of writing. Always, always, always, be able to answer the "why are we learning this" in real world terms.

More later as time allows...

Tick Tock!!!

     Two Snow Days
     2 hour Delayed Start
+  1 day Review Before Finals
_________________________
One Remarkably Fried Beginning Teacher

Yep, I'm slightly concerned about how these kids are going to do on the departmental final....

Snow Day

Yay! It's a snow day!

While I welcome the break - seriously, who is going to turn down a day off - but well, the kids actually did need the day of review...

Anyway, here's a pic of the snow in front of the house....

Double Jeopardy

Here we are at the last real class day before a day or two of review and then the final for the first semester.

Of course, given the grand and wonderful nature of arriving at so prestigious an event, I noticed as I took attendance during my first block, that most of my first block class had decided to observe this occasion through taking a holiday.

As I was now down by nearly a third in students, I decided that spending the last day on reading that last short story might not be the best use of my time. As such, while Channel One finished its Week In Rap broadcast, I designed a rather simple Jeopardy-style game, found at here. 

For the first block, which is a CP level class, I divided them into two teams, which selected a representative to buzz in to respond once a question had been read. I drew a large bulls-eye on the board, and had them race up to place their hand on the center to respond.

This was a mistake.

After a block of good natured racing towards the white board at top speed, colliding with it, and taking out anything that might have been on or around it, and shaking the wall of the classroom on the other side, I designed a new method.

Two opposing desks with a circle drawn on a piece of paper, with students seated, hands in laps, waiting to buzz in.

This worked fine for second block, the only casualty being a false nail broken against the desk.

We shall see how it goes for fourth.

Updates to follow...

FOURTH UPDATE:

Well, I have to say, I don't know that I've seen these kids this engaged through most of the year. For much of it, I've fought outside influences, poor choices of both parents and students, a lack of prime instructional time, and the usual hampering effect of inexperience. Today, they were arguing finer points of literary terms, referencing examples and counter-examples as they moved through the game, and generally engaging with the material.

We will wait and see how they do on the final, but if they can muster up the kind of enthusiasm I saw today, the kind of passion about the material that they had when competing with each other, they will do just fine!

Let's Make A Deal...

So, I had a new one today. Student walks into my classroom, having discovered that not turning in work since the beginning of November will result in failing the course, and asks me, with a perfectly straight face, if there were anything he could buy in order to improve his grade.

I haven't decided yet if I should be insulted or not.

The professional in me is very upset; I don't recall ever including a wine-list style menu with my syllabus for the course...

"Why of course, sir! The 2011 A- is an excellent vintage, sir, and has a cost that is appropriate. If it seems out of your price range, we also have the C- in a Box as well..."

It is as it is, I suppose. I am just left to wonder, what on earth have we taught these children that they think they can buy their way out of every situation?

The Beginning Teacher Choice Awards...

First, I must admit this isn't original to me; this is a blatantly swiped awards programs from a honored veteran of the field, and as such should be understood as not necessarily competing with the same, but rather as a compliment to it through imitation. In honor of the rapidly dwindling semester, and the last full week of classes prior to the end, I present to you, the first ever semiannual Beginning Teacher Choice Awards, hosted by yours truly, the Beginning Teacher.

It goes without saying that many, many individuals are worthy of a Beginning Teacher Choice Award, and truly, everyone should be proud of their efforts this semester. Still, only a few of the many could win, the winners are as follows:

The Beginning Teacher Choice Clockwork Award: This award goes out to the select few students who give their all to remain consistent, and inevitably are knocking on the classroom door three minutes after the tardy bell, who have been so steady in their performance, or lack thereof, that they have become a fixture in the environment of the day, so much so that their ever so rare punctuality is as a gift on Christmas morning.


The Beginning Teacher Choice TMI Award: While there were many candidates this semester, there is one particular instance that stands above and beyond all others. This award, given for the selfless sharing of information for the joy and entertainment, if not edification, of others goes to the young lady who decided that she must inform the entire hallway that she had not had sex in weeks and needed to get laid.

The Beginning Teacher Choice "Not Helping" Award: The gentleman that upon said announcement, immediately volunteered.

The Beginning Teacher Choice "Wow" Award: This one is a toss-up between two students. The first has repeatedly insisted on leaving class every other day for various athletic excursions, has not done any work throughout the entire semester, and now, in the last week of class, has demanded a parent-teacher conference, as he has obviously failed the course. The second has, every single day of the semester, peppered the class with various ignorant and racially charged statements, ranging from the generic "you people" to the very specific "I don't know why we have to read <air quote> Black Literature </air quote> anyway!"

The Beginning Teacher Choice Award for Best Actor in a Supporting Role: The gentleman who decided that, when a young lady claimed that her desk was too heavy to put into her assigned group for a small-group project, he should instead, pick up her, her desk, and her attending books beneath it, and place her into the group.

The Beginning Teacher Choice "Unsung Hero" Award:  This is the only award that I would give to several students, and I honestly wish I could give them recognition. A few of my students, in each class, have been here every day, are always on task, always make sure to be prepared for whatever I throw at them, and are just all-around good kids. They do what they should, are driven to succeed, and while they may struggle at times, they never give up. These are the students that keep me coming in every morning, no matter how tired I am, and keep me staying late every evening, as I cannot help but match their dedication and enthusiasm for their own education.